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Scared To Succeed

Linda Brown

Linda Brown

Active Member
Standard Member
Aug 6, 2014
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I've been watching these forums over the last two weeks and finally decided to log in and post something.

I'm 31 years old, no children - I suffer from chronic migraines and my diet has never been 100% perfect, but I never considered it a problem. My weight stacked on because of medication. Then all of a sudden your so big you can't exercise or walk properly. This is the kickstart I needed, lose a few kg's first so I can walk properly and hope everything falls in place. The perfect fairy tale.

I want to keep a record of this, and most definitely get advice to help me along.

Starting weight was 117.4kgs
Current weight is 107.9kgs

Week one - I've pretty much never felt so alive. My adrenalin is running, I'm wide awake, talking a little too fast and running on fumes. I didn't feel hungry at all, which is a totally unique and foreign experience to me as I usually eat 3 decent size meals a day - and I never skip. But the excess energy is great, taking the dog for longer walks, going to the park. My mouth is dry, but I keep forgetting to drink water - which is also odd because I usually have at least 2 litres before lunch every day. Not sleeping very well, but waking up feeling very refreshed. Fruit for lunch, and for dinner usually a meat/veg combo but could only stomach a few mouthfuls. My weight dropped a kg a day, but I'm pretty sure most of it was water/fluid.

Week two - So this is the current week. I think the sleep deprivation is finally catching up. I can go to bed about 11-12 and sleep for about 6 hours. I don't feel as refreshed as I did last week, but I'm not tired either. My skin has also decided to break out, it's actually embarrasing how red and blotchy my face is. But I can only assume it's the toxins exiting my system. I've been eating carrot and celery sticks, cherry tomatoes and a few grissini at lunch - for dinner I'm not hungry so I just pick at fruit and veges. I know it's wrong, but I feel physically sick. I have exercised every single day though which is great. But my skin is horrible and I'm feeling nausea all day long. I think the hardest part is knowing I can't give up. Because if I give up old habits will come right back. I'm thinking the best way to tackle this is to keep the fresh veges for as long as possible. I might try throwing some meat/protein in 3-4 times a week. Even if it's a few bites.

So week one, awesome. Week two, not so great. But the thing is, I've actually learnt something. I've learnt that I'm not going to give up. Seeing the first 10kg slide away just made me more determined to make this work. So I just need to add more into my diet, but not overdose. I need to keep drinking that water, even if it's small sips. I need to keep getting out there every day even if it's only for 30 mins and do some sort of exercise.

I wonder if week two has really been that bad, or have I just been expecting more. Week 1, I was 10kg down, week 2 nothing so far. I don't want to, nor would it be healthy to lose that every week. So it's just a mind over matter game. I'm scared, confused, and worried that this might not work. But I have to try.
 
What the heck! I should be proud of this not ashamed. I should also point out that the top I am wearing I purchased just over a month ago. It was an XL and I really needed an XXL but I was too embarrassed, so I just got the smaller size. It didn't fit very well, I find being overweight that tops don't seem to go down low enough because they're holding in your stomach. Now I could stretch that top out. But the best part is the support. I work as a travel agent and in my office of 5 staff, everyone has always harped on at me about my weight, now they can't stop complimenting. This is all the inspiration I need :) Needless to say, very proud of myself so far today.
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This Saturday marks a full month since I started Duromine. almost 20kgs gone!! Full diet change, exercise daily... The routine is there but I've opted to stay on another month because I want to make sure it's completely broken!!