After days of being pestered by my mother over the phone, I decide to step on the scales to see how bad the damage is; the scales return an error - I guess that's me off the hook. Not that I would ever share my weight with her. I'm 37, not 7. My weight, my life.
Was it really my life? I stop, I breathe, memories flood back to how amazing my life used to be and how dumb I was to not see that changing until it was too late.
I book in with my GP who immediately recommends surgery - it's the new "easy fix" - I explain that every time I have needed "keyhole surgery" I've ended up being completely opened up and required weeks of recovery afterwards. I don't have the luxury of being able to afford the time off.
He then suggests Duromine. Hesitant, I agree that at this point, that's my best option. He asks me to step on the scales - 160kg! The last time I stepped on scales was 12 months ago and then I weighed 147kg. I feel nauseated just thinking about it. No wonder I don't have a partner or my own family (no children). My GP can see that thoughts are speeding through my mind - he knows I have bipolar tendencies and asks if I'm still seeing my psychologist, I confirm that I see her at least once a month.
Today is my second day on duromine. I haven't lost my appetite, but I am thirstier, a lot less tired and a little more motivated. Sleep doesn't happen at normal times anymore - hence this post.
I can't share with family or friends so this blog will be my accountability on my journey from 160kg to 95kg.
Was it really my life? I stop, I breathe, memories flood back to how amazing my life used to be and how dumb I was to not see that changing until it was too late.
I book in with my GP who immediately recommends surgery - it's the new "easy fix" - I explain that every time I have needed "keyhole surgery" I've ended up being completely opened up and required weeks of recovery afterwards. I don't have the luxury of being able to afford the time off.
He then suggests Duromine. Hesitant, I agree that at this point, that's my best option. He asks me to step on the scales - 160kg! The last time I stepped on scales was 12 months ago and then I weighed 147kg. I feel nauseated just thinking about it. No wonder I don't have a partner or my own family (no children). My GP can see that thoughts are speeding through my mind - he knows I have bipolar tendencies and asks if I'm still seeing my psychologist, I confirm that I see her at least once a month.
Today is my second day on duromine. I haven't lost my appetite, but I am thirstier, a lot less tired and a little more motivated. Sleep doesn't happen at normal times anymore - hence this post.
I can't share with family or friends so this blog will be my accountability on my journey from 160kg to 95kg.
